Good night, dont let the thought bugs bite

 In the midst of the night

under shadow of the sun

laying among the busiest creatures 

I wonder, why am i awake?

Being conscious keeps me awake or

is it being oblivious to consciousness?

Thoughts passing through window pane of my head

uncontrollable as though i am floating through a sea of bed

some real, some vague 

some stuff to take care of, some to make

How i wish this would stop

like a bubble into sleep i pop

but i am too drowned in worries of my own

to feel important i wear it as a crown

i know a little, of a lot

its a fight i lost, even before i fought 

Travel lite

take what does not belong
feels heavy this unwanted luggage
doesn't let me go far and long

thought they were precious
but they dont make they break us
thought they were close
but its a mirage it shows
thought they were mine
but they were a borrowed dime

take what does not belong
wanna sing my being free song

Full circle

there is no breath that is lost

there is no sight that is flawed

there is no heart that doesn't ache

there is no journey without a break 

there is no mountain that doesn't bend

there is no story that doesn't end

there is no craving that is selfless

there is no crying that is worthless

there is no high without a low

there is no come-in without a go

what am i here for and what do I want

there seems no answer and it haunts and haunts and haunts 

Searching....

Wide awake in my sleep

the rabbit hole runs too deep

lips smile and tears drop from eye

time is running past and i am on standby

I drown the mind in a glass

drink it up burning my chest

as I cannot make it listen to what I said

Wide awake in my sleep

the rabbit hole runs too deep

thoughts never becomes actions

actions are result of reactions 

words run flat or at best slow

futile like blunt arrow left from the bow

Wide awake in my sleep 

the rabbit hole runs too deep 

I search for me, I search for me

I need you soon, please call me

inching to know what I am here for

until then, wide awake in my sleep 

the rabbit hole runs too deep

F**k you "the one and only"

You promised us rainbow
so we stood in the rain
We spread our palms for a wish
you hit us with a cane
we take a leap by believing in you
you look around without giving a clue
I know we are strong but please do not test
dont give us news we cannot digest
you can play with us but not like this
promised the beach and showed us abyss !!

unblock

lots of thoughts kept within

bubbling up but popped early

before it becomes an awkward scene 

if they free a bit, the thoughts might rise

to become a voice and not die inside

if they open up a bit, connections be made 

making a new path where plans can be laid

take a chance, try your luck

a step forward is better than being stuck

hope for the best and go ahead

dance it through before you lay to rest

infinity = 1

Rise to the one from yearn of none

place yourself in the light of sun

bathe in the glory of no one

dry yourself in the sanctity of someone 

long gone are the life of just

righteousness has gone to dust

swim through the weed of lust

avoid the whirlpools of mistrust 

then you reach and you will see

the one is you and you are me

Angles from hell

Break the surface, look through

beyond the ashes lies a life too

dig deeper, i wont blame you

some angels come from hell too

crack the bottle, let it take over you 

numb your pain and settle down

or make a prick and fly around

cause some angels come from hell too

Detach

Big in your head, small in your mind

it should be the other way round but

without opening your eyes, you act blind

The daily life, the daily struggle

the needs of your body
some you handle some you fumble

Time passes, act is done, you performed

but did you learn ?

Find your purpose, break the chain

you belong to no one, you belong to no where

you are the one, you are everywhere !!

Decisions

Freedom in your hands
but bound by your thoughts
You wanna do things
but say, life is too short
Take your time and do it right
but the longer you take, right wont be right
Cry and beg, time wont come back
time lost in thinking, you will trace back
and say, I would rather do it wrong
than to take too long !!

We

We have crawled out from the depths of despair
we are shattered but not beyond repair
come on, its not anyone's fault
you be the water, I'll be the salt
we are the ocean, vast and wild
lets still be humble, happy and kind

We have fought some wars in our own way
some we have won and some made us pay
glory had its days, ruins had the nights
empire we built has to perish someday
lets settle down for a democratic way

We have a long way to go and a short sight to see
we are bound together, and yet still free
you be the leg, I'll be the feet
let this journey be, beyond defeat

selfish

The word most commonly used in a negative context of describing a person or an act. Its not a word that describes a person but its a word that describes a person from the perspective of the speaker. A person can only be described correctly with one sentence. 

HE/SHE IS WHAT HE/SHE IS

Nothing more, nothing less. Everything else is just perspective. Just judgement passed by someone else based on their capabilities, based on their knowledge, based on their wiseness and even based on their selfishness. 

Actually, I don't see the difference between selfishness and selflessness. Both have opposite meaning in dictionary. An act which is done for self is termed selfishness and an act done for others is termed as selflessness. The act is still done by the same person. He does this act, because he wishes to do it. Fulfilling a wish of your own is also an act of being selfish. The practical or visual result might vary based on what the act is, but still the wish to do it, makes anyone selfish.

Does this mean, its good to be selfish ? Any act that gives you happiness is a good act. Be it selfish or selfless. If the result of the act makes others happy along with yourself, then even better. 

Does it mean, being greedy is also okay ? Its important to understand what happiness is. When happiness is measured or viewed materialistically, its greed. When happiness is viewed in a sensual or spiritual way, then greed would not govern the act.

YOU !! Think again

A life in your head, an identity in your mind
a persona in your conscious, makes the present blind
seeking for the momentary joy, what lies in front is not enjoyed
peeking through a transitory space, you start a spiral chase

Do you try to be someone that you are not
or do you sort to be someone that you want
do you mirror the shadows of others
or do you try to spread more of your feathers
do you seek for others acceptance
or do you question others of their presence

You are a complex mixture of your past
you are an anomaly of the present and 
you are the unquestioned answer of the future

Inner voices

Walk on the soft sand
Pressing your feet against the wetness, you press some of your inner thoughts out of your mind. The vast ocean claims you in it's vastness and you find yourself no bigger than the grain of sand that it spits off the shore. The thoughts that arise are much deeper like the ocean and as striking as the morning sun. These thoughts exist but seldom felt, they feed on your subconscious like a termite on timber. When the sun goes down and in the view of darkness, the crabs creep out of their sand hole, just like that, these thoughts make way to your conscious.
These thoughts question sometimes your current being and makes you think. But it's not something specific and it's not something you can give more thought on and find an answer.
It's like the murky waters at the shore. Nothing is clear but everything seems to be there. You can collect the murky water and let it calm down and let the sand sink in. It takes time, like a kid takes all the time to build his indestructible sand castle, it takes work. With these two ingredients, you can put these thoughts to rest and discover something new about yourself and your current being might just move like a snail to your higher self.

The endless plains

Bed of gold with emerald blue cover
lies a life that takes you back in time
where innocent cruelty of nature defines the rules
food chain in perfect balance
days are quieter than the night
lives matter until it must
and where no one is a sinner

Man a mere spectator
of this spectacular game for survival
not altering it to suit his wish
life around seems to ignore this self crowned King
but still at his mercy
to thrive and flourish

River bank

A sun kissed evening sky, making the banks of a calm river serene and tranquil. The sound of birds chirping fills the rather silent atomsphere with sweet talk. Jazz music being played in a far by restaurant gives the added pleasure of being here, right now. Alone, yet not longing for company, silent but content, like the fallen tree that lies in the middle of the river. It does not move, decomposes itself to provide life support to other smaller occupants.

On the bank, there are all sorts of emotions, laying and sitting staring at inevitable fading of the day. Some love being shared and expressed, some anger trying to vanish with the orange sun, some loss being forgotten with a beer, some happiness happy of it's being and some weirdness trying to figure out itself.

Evenings like this come and go often, but we experience it seldom. There could be many reasons but every reason have you in common. Reason reflect our choices, our priorities from where, all these emotions come from. Whatever it is, controlling your actions and accepting the outcome let's you be the tree standing against the flow of the river yet in peace.

It's not about what you do or think on such a evening, but what the evening makes you think or do.

idream

I dream to reach for the stars
with just a paper boat

I dream to make a better world
with just a thought

I dream to cry out loud
with just a happy face

I dream to come to reality
with just your embrace

I dream to write a song
with just a broken empty pen

I dream to have a fight
with just me and you to win

Voices and Glimpses

Waves of the ocean in dark
sounding it's presence, not revealing
sometimes wild, sometimes soothing
sometimes screaming, sometimes singing
Am I aligning my thoughts to their verses
or are they letting me feel what resides within.

From the shores, it looks like a black hole
a lighthouse showing me a glimpse
revealing the scarred face of ocean
seems like a mirror to my soul

Alles Gute

This is the day when you came into to this world, its the day when I saw your face for the first time. You were wrapped into a bundle with warm cotton folds and seemed to me like the morning dew wrapped in layers of flower petals. Your eyes closed, with lavish eyelashes, the red nose with which you were breathing for the first time, your skin still covered with layers of your mom's protection that kept you safe for the first few months, made you look like a work of art which sprouts countless emotions that I did not even know existed.

Every year on this day, no matter how many years passes by, I will still remember the baby whose hands held my finger, never to let it go, whose head rested so perfectly in my palms, whose chest rested on my shoulders to burp after a feed, who found chest of his father more comfortable to the softness of the bed.

Happy Birthday son...for the years past and many more years to come !!

Cherie forever

You were far, but never from my heart
Not in sight, but we never grew apart
I thought of you many times with a smile on my face
Now you gone leaving love as your trace

Thank you dear for all the joy and fun
I hope I gave you some too in return
Thanks to her who brought you and me together
In this cruel world you made our lives better

Hope you have a nice journey ahead
Keep spreading love like you always do
My hairy fluffy smelly baby

Cherie, I will miss you forever and ever